Liam’s Story

I had turned 30 a week before my mum went into hospital. It completely flipped my world upside down. 

My mum had been ill for a couple of years before she passed away. It was just under a week from the day she went into hospital to losing her, but it felt like a lifetime.

With her being ill for some time before, I'd almost gone through anticipatory grief during that entire process.

I knew that she was never going to get better; my mum was a very active and social person, so when her independence was taken away, she started to deteriorate. 

At the time, I went into fight mode. I knew that I would have a lot to deal with - the funeral, the house, etc. In those first initial months, because I needed to, I just got through tasks, including clearing out a house that had 25+ years of memories in it, and looking for a new place to live. 

I'm quite a pragmatic person, so this was the best way for me to survive. 

Again, being a pragmatic and rational person, I went on a journey to figure out how I was feeling and why. I'm a true believer in embracing emotions, so that's what I did. 

I read books, spoke with friends and eventually started to find content on TikTok. I've discovered such a great community of people on the platform, and I don't know where I would be without out. From both finding other creators and posting my own content, it's helped to express my feelings and, hopefully, provide some comfort and solace for other people who are going through the same experience. 

I've also discovered who my true friends are - the ones that know I'm not okay and are more than willing to be a shoulder to cry on, or provide a distraction whenever I need it.

Do you have a favourite memory you would like to share?

One of my favourite memories with my mum is when we went to see Sam Smith in concert. She absolutely loved their music and was so grateful when my sister and I bought her tickets for Christmas one year. Seeing her happy made me very happy.